You're Homophobic and Heterosexist. Yes, You.

I'm back!

I've actually been meaning to write this blog post for a minute, but I postponed it until I could accurately articulate all that I wanted to say. Then, a tweef (Twitter Beef) erupted between Chris Brown and Raz-B yesterday, and I found it largely appropriate.

If you don't know, Raz-B, formerly of B2K, tweeted some creeptastic love tweets to Rihanna, with no reply, and then posted a snide comment to Chris Brown about how he couldn't understand how anyone could attack Rihanna blah blahness. Chris went all crazy and started calling Raz-B all kinds of stuff, saying things about the state of his anus and about how he's gay--honey, it was nuts!

Then a couple minutes ago, I got on Twitter and saw a link to this article on TMZ about how Chris Brown is apologizing and saying that he's not homophobic.

|Insert straight human face resembling this ---> o_o|

Chris, you's a damn lie.

You don't get to make fun of someone using references to stereotypical or actual gay behavior and then be like "I love gay people!" and think you get a pass. Negro, PLEASE.

You are homophobic. Wanna know how I know? Because I'm homophobic. My momma's homophobic. My pastor's homophobic. My friends are homophobic. Everyone I know is homophobic.

I know you might be confused since I've posted a couple blogs demonizing and drawing attention to homophobia. But it's true. I can't help it. I'm homophobic too. And heterosexist.

I've been raised in a society where being gay was (and is) seen as something "other," something weird, something disgusting, something abominable. Unfortunately, it something that stays with me since I've internalized it and subscribed to it for many years.

I work hard to eradicate my homophobia and my heterosexism just as others work to work through their racism and sexism (and I do that too). I constantly cast down and check my homophobic thoughts. I remind myself daily about the necessary love I must have for the LGBT community. I incessantly force myself to have views about the LGBT community that work for justice.

And you do it too, either outright or inside. As much as you try to deny it, you're homophobic deep down in your core. You believe stereotypes. You use the word "gay" as a slur or epithet. You laugh at "feminine" men. You don't believe in gay "marriage" simply based on the traditional definition of "marriage" as if language is locked and definitions never change over time and across cultures...

But I digress.

We all are homophobic and heterosexist. And it's okay as long as it doesn't stay that way, as long as you fight through it in order to promote love and justice, as long as you are casting down every hateful thought, as long as you realize that legislation should never be used to oppress others and deny them of their natural right to love and happiness.

It pains me every single day. I hate that I'm homophobic and heterosexist, absolutely despise that part of myself. But I constantly educate myself and try to show love, understanding, sympathy, and, when I can, empathy.

I also check my language and try not to publicly make fun of a person by utilizing gay slurs and pretend it's okay!

So, Chris, gon head and slap yourself because you are homophobic.

Most of us, if not all of us, are.